Why should you care
by rizzo1
Summary: this was meant to be part of the last chapter but it didn't upload.please R&R carby
1. Default Chapter

Author notes: I'am not sure when this is set properly after luka and Abby break up.  
  
She had actually done it after several failed attempts she did it properly she managed to kill her self well I suppose anyone who jumped in front of the el would die. But why was now any different from when she was six years old. She didn't care that was cold comfort now she really had no one Eric had a family now and luka was long gone and carter didn't care about her so why would anybody care that she was drinking. Why stop there why does anybody care she was alive. Once Richard had a drop of emotion for her now he had his teacher and a kid. God she was such a loser walling in her own self pity one part of her said get a grip and pull your self together but the other part told her just to end it. She looked at her watch she should really get to bed she took another swig of vodka and by some miracle managed to get into bed with out falling over she quickly got into bed and let the blankets create a nest around her alcohol filled body.  
  
****3 hours later****  
  
Her alarm was drilling into her head forcing her to open her eyes to the cruel light of day. Great another day in the life of Abby Lockheart.she got up had a shower and a cup of coffee (with a special ingredient) and left for another day of her life.  
  
****At the ER****  
  
She walked quickly into the lounge not wanting to face the usual  
  
"You o.k. Abby you look bad" Or "Are you o.k."  
  
"Hey Abby"  
  
Oh god she hadn't seen carter lurking in the corner reading the newspaper  
  
"Hi"she said not realising how horse her voice was  
  
"Are you o.k."  
  
Here it comes she thought.  
  
"yep I'm just great"  
  
"If you say so"  
  
And with that he left the lounge.  
  
.................................. WILL CONTINUE ASAP 


	2. why don't you care

"Abby trauma coming in ETA 3 minutes set"  
  
She jumped slightly and answered the figure.  
  
"O.k."  
  
Abby said slowly getting up felling a bit woozy but surged it off  
  
****15 minutes later****  
  
"He's crashing charge the paddles"weaver  
  
"50 of adavine"weaver  
  
"Abby ,Abby "weaver  
  
Abby had completely zoned out and forget were she was.  
  
"Sorry what do you won't"  
  
"Chuny get in here take over from Abby"weaver  
  
Abby walked pulling off her gloves and heading to the restroom and splashing water over her face. God she couldn't believe this was happening to her. Maggie killed her self and she was a wreck because of it and now her life was so screwed up!!!!  
  
"Abby are you o.k. we completely lost you in that trauma"  
  
"I'am really sorry Dr weaver I don't know what got into to me"  
  
"Don't worry Abby we all have bad days but if you ever need to talk I hope you feel you can come to me"  
  
"I do and I will tell you there's something bothering me"  
  
"Great"  
  
With that weaver walked out she was surprised how friendly weaver was being but decided it was a nice change.  
  
Abby quickly left the rest room and went to triage to get a patient but was stopped by jerry.  
  
"Abby phone call for you it's the funeral home won't to know what you won't to do with the body" jerry whispered quietly  
  
"Thanks"  
  
she didn't wont people at work to know about her mom dieing but in 10 minutes the whole ER will know. She quickly answered the phone  
  
"Hello"  
  
"Well I didn't really care"  
  
"Well what's the cheapest?"  
  
"Yere that's fine"  
  
"No, I won't her buried"  
  
"No just burry her"  
  
"No I wont be there, no one will"  
  
"5th of February I'll write it in my diary but I defiantly wont be coming"  
  
"Yere well same to you bye" she said getting angry and slammed the phone down and quickly walked into the lounge quickly followed bye carter who had listened to the whole telephone conversation  
  
"Why didn't tell me "  
  
"What could have you done"  
  
"I could have listened"  
  
"It's a long story"  
  
"Tell me then" he waited for a replay but didn't get one so took it as a sign to continue  
  
"Meet me at docs in 15 minutes"  
  
Abby only nodded and watched him walkout.  
  
****25 minutes later**** 


	3. I only won't to help

"I didn't think you were going to come" carter  
  
"Neither did I" Abby said honestly  
  
After a few seconds of silent a waiters comes over  
  
"Hi I'm Jane I'll be your waitress today what can I get you?" The young lady said cheerfully to cheerfully for Abby's liking  
  
"Ummm I'll have a coffee and pie please" said carter politely  
  
"And you maim" said the waitress  
  
"I'll have a still water please"  
  
"I'll be back shortly with your orders"  
  
"Thanks" carter said kindly  
  
Abby waited a few seconds and said  
  
"So carter what do you won't" said Abby trying to get this conversation over as quickly as possible.  
  
"I just wonted to see how you are we haven't spoken in a while and I haven't seen you at a meetings for ages."  
  
"Well I've been busy!" Abby said slightly raising her voice  
  
"And you could have told me about your mother I could have helped" carter said sympathy  
  
"How stopped the train from running over her worthless body" Abby quickly wiped away the tears that she felt forming in the back of her eyes.  
  
"No I couldn't have stopped the train but you could have talked to me about it a shoulder to cry on so to speak"asid carter 


	4. what have you done

"Well thanks but no thanks I don't need anyone shoulder to cry on especially not yours!" she said more angrily then she intended  
  
"What's that supposed to mean?" cater said getting angry too  
  
"You now what I've got to go before Kerry comes and gets me personally" Abby said trying to leave as quickly as possible  
  
"No that's o.k. I'm just going to go straight to bed" said Abby smoothly. She was good at these white lies the ones that never did anybody any harm but just helped her out of sticky situations  
  
"Ohh o.k. I'll see you tomorrow then I guess" Said carter trying to hide his disappoint  
  
"Bye" said Abby  
  
"Yere Bye" said carter quietly as Abby was walking away  
  
"Here your orders" said the waitress  
  
"Thanks" said carter not even looking  
  
................................. Abby didn't know why her feet had taken her here it was really weird she could her them speaking from outside but she couldn't go in her feet wouldn't let her go in how ever much she wanted to so she walked away like she normally did she walked away not having the courage and emotional energy to go through the whole cycle she was in a rut and couldn't get out of it.  
  
She was about three blocks away from the meeting and her eyes caught a bright blue neon light "liquor 24 7"  
  
She never noticed it before, maybe because she wasn't looking for it. She tried to think of all the reasons she shouldn't go in but when it came down to it nothing was stopping her anymore and she really wanted a drink.  
  
5 minutes later she walked out with a bag full of liquor. 


	5. next

.................................. At first she felt guilty she didn't no why, but after a couple of rounds her guilty was swapped with a new found energy. She wonted to do something crazy. She picked up the phone and clicked speed dial and clicked on carters name it rung about 10 times before the answer phone picked up.  
  
"Hi this is john I'm not here at the moment but if you leave a message I'll get back to you.  
  
"Hi john just wanted to say hi and Maggie really liked you and I am glad she dead"  
  
She quickly hung up not relishing what she done.  
  
..................................  
  
After a twelve hour shift from hell carter walked through the door to see the tiny red light flashing. He hated leaving unread messages so he played the message while he changed into some sweats  
  
As soon as he heared Abby's voice he stopped  
  
"Hi john just wanted to say hi and Maggie really liked you and I am glad she dead"  
  
God what had she done. He could instantly tell she was drunk from her slurred voice. This had gone to far. 


End file.
